There are really only three reasons you seek out a doctor’s care, none of which are pleasant. First, there is the annual physical. I don’t know anyone who greets this visit with open arms. At the other extreme, there is the ER visit. Whether you’re a weekend warrior with a broken toe or a trauma victim delivered by ambulance, this is not a place you want to be. For most, it is something in between: the unexpected office visit.

I’ve experienced all three types in recent years, and come away with very strong opinions about the customer service provided. My most recent was today, when a small but painful eye infection sent me to the doctor for an unplanned office visit. It was also the best customer experience I’ve had in several years, demonstrating many of the best practices we demand from other businesses – but rarely from our caretakers.

Show interest in the customer
My regular physician was out, so I saw the physician on call. I had seen him once before (a wretched fall), and he took time to ask me how my ankle was doing – a year after he treated me. (Customer research re: past experience with our practice.)

Conduct customer research
After examining my eye (the source of the visit), he asked me what I thought was going on. My first thought was “You’re the doctor – you tell me.” But he quickly added that I know my body better than he does. Have these symptoms happened before? Is there anything else awry? What is my body telling me? In other words, customer research – in the truest sense of the word.

I gave him a brief description of why I thought it was one of two things (provided customer data points) and stated what I hoped – not thought, but hoped – was the answer. He considered the data points and examined additional areas of the eye. (Additional customer research based on new data.)

Make a recommendation, supported by customer data
In the end, he agreed with my assessment, and provided a detailed reason why he agreed with me. (Postmortem, although in this case the “mortem” refers to the end of the visit.)

He concluded by giving me a detailed description of how to treat the symptoms without fulfilling the RX, reflecting my previously stated preference to not go stampeded to the prescription counter. (Acknowledging customer preferences and working to accommodate them.)

He also gave me a prescription to fill in two days if the non-pharmaceutical approach did not work out. (Anticipating and proactively addressing the customer’s future needs.)

Thank the customer for his/her business
He ended by thanking me for coming in, shaking my hand and providing a card with instructions to call anytime over the weekend if I had questions or felt worse. (Proactively offering customer support.)
Outside of telling me to go left instead of right to find the exit – which he quickly corrected (identify missteps and take action to correct immediately), it was the perfect customer experience. (Providing positive customer feedback, closing the loop on the visit.)

Cable network TNT sent its marketing team in the wayback machine this week to send out a “sneak peek” at a new show, Men of a Certain Age. Which, based on the cast (Scott Bakula, Andre Braugher and Ray Romano) is somewhere in the late 40s to early 50s. Presumably, these men of a certain age made romantic mix tapes for their would-be loved ones in their youth. Or a mix tape to enjoy while driving around. Or, and I’m just guessing here, to enhance getting baked in their mom’s basement.

The “mix tape” is an iconic touch point for anyone of a certain age, especially those who know what a “tape” is. (Was.) These men of a certain age most certainly spent some quality time in mom’s basement making mixes to celebrate love, mourn getting dumped and generally show off their masterful knowledge of hot jams. (For the ultimate example of this male prototype, see John Cusack in High Fidelity.) Naturally, these men are now older, but somewhere deep inside each one, an insecure teenager is dying to find audio perfection.

Which brings me to the marketing experiment that arrived in our snail mail this week (for no apparent reason!). TNT has spent at least a few bucks to create a giant faux tape box containing a tiny-but-heavy rubber “mix tape” that’s really a flash drive that plugs into your computer’s USB port. The drive contains three songs in a play-only Shockwave format (alas, no MP3s) that presumably represent the three men at the heart of the show. I say presumably because I can’t imagine any person on Earth putting “Up Around the Bend” by Creedance Clearwater Revival, “Here I Go Again” by Whitesnake and “The Best of Times” by Styx on the same tape voluntarily.

My expectation is that these songs will play while the three men bond in the car, driving in the perfection that is the Magic Hour (right before the sun sets). Or perhaps while smoking weed they stole from one of their children in the basement. I’m pretty sure they won’t be playing any of these songs while holding a CD player over their heads. I just don’t see wooing the Mrs with Whitesnake.

I’m just guessing, of course, as I didn’t bother to watch the core marketing piece on the tape: a “sneek peek” for the show itself. I just can’t get excited about a show revolving around middle-aged men who like Whitesnake, CCR and Styx. I’m also curious as to how I was targeted to receive this particular piece. The best theory I’ve had to date, based on the name used on the address label: cable cousin (via Time Warner) HBO sold/lent my name to TNT.

I purchased a True Blood tee directly from HBO.com earlier this year, and fully expected to get marketing from at least HBO. They have not disappointed, letting me know every single item that has entered the store related to every show on the air. Every HBO touch has been via e-mail, however.

TNT clearly spent at least some marketing dollars to get attention for their show. The question is, did  it work? Yes and no. No in that I still don’t have any interest in the show, and in fact any chance I might have given it (based solely on the cast) pretty much died when presented with these music choices. (I now have a mash up of “Up Around the Bend” and “Here I Go Again” stuck in my brain. I fear I may go insane!)

On the plus side – at least for TNT – they got exactly what every show desires: a free plug.

Most actors try to get inside their character’s head and may even alter their physical appearance to match (think Robert DeNiro in Raging Bull). Not NPH. He works “from the outside in”:

When we were filming Dr. Horrible, I was imagining watching it in my living room. When I’m co-hosting with Kelly Ripa, I’m not thinking Neil the Actor. I’m thinking, Housewife, ironing clothes, 11 o’clock. What kind of thing does she want to see?

This floored me. I’ve studied cinema and acting for much of my life (as a hobby, mostly) and never heard of this self-visualization technique. What he’s really doing is thinking of his audience members and what they’d respond to. And then packing a performance with them in mind.

Considering his success, I’d say it’s working for him.

I recognize that it’s not easy for everyone to put themselves into their customer’s place, so I developed a little exercise that I think might help. I call it the Lunchbox Method.

Have you ever made a lunch for a child or significant other? There are a number of ways to approach this seemingly simple task.

To meet the requirements of providing a lunch without much thought or effort, you could simply provide money or a debit card to buy whatever he or she wants. This is akin to being the CEO of a company: You decide to fund this “lunch thing” and don’t put any real thought or effort into it except to ensure the money’s there when it’s needed.

Moving beyond simply being a funder, you could assemble a perfunctory meal by grabbing some food from the pantry and/or refrigerator and tossing it in a bag. You’ve met the requirements of a lunch, but did you check to see whether the foods go well together? Are they part of a balanced diet, or will your loved one have a post-lunch sugar tirade followed by a late afternoon crash? Is there enough food to satisfy the recipient’s hunger?

At this level, you’re working as the project manager - trying to write a spec or plan for a healthy, filling lunch. To consider the customer experience, you must go even deeper. So you put together a good lunch – and there’s plenty of it – but does your loved one even like the foods you’re including? Have any of these selections previously met with disapproval at dinner time or returned home in lunch bags past only barely touched? Here you start considering customer data. This is akin to customer experience in that you are starting to focus on other people’s likes and dislikes (and not your own individual preferences and peeves). But you can still go deeper.

Now let’s look at how the food will be consumed. This is the heart of customer experience, because you are actually opening the bag in your mind and imagining how it will be consumed at lunch time. Does the food require a fork or a spoon to consume? Is it messy? If so, add any necessary cutlery and perhaps an extra napkin or two. Are there hot and cold foods included, such as a thermos of soup and a frosty beverage? If so, maybe you need two bags or a lunchbag with separate hot and cold compartments.

Let’s take it a step further. You want to delight your customer, right? (Especially since, in this exercise, it’s someone you personally know and love!) How about a special treat like a favorite homemade snack or even some leftover Easter or Halloween candy and a small personal note. When your family member opens her lunch bag, you want her face to light up – especially if she’s been very good and you’re overdue to reward her for some great behavior or a thoughtful gesture.

Finally, after the day is done, look at the remains to see how much of each food came back (objective data) and ask your customer what they thought (subjective data). Customer focus is not a one-time reality check you conduct at the end of a project, it should be an iterative process that you apply every step of the way. You need to validate your assumptions and course correct when you find you’ve diverged from a particular customer base’s needs.

Keep in mind that your customers’ tastes may change over time, as anyone with a 6-year-old can attest. The same is especially true on the Internet, where likes and dislikes evolve with every passing meme. And naturally, every project is different so consider differences in customer segments, though at the most basic level just thinking about how someone other than you approaches a particular thing is a step in the right direction.

Food for thought, I hope.

The key to good headline writing is to have a clear call to action in mind, the more immediate the better! Then think about what the customer wants to get out of the transaction. This generally requires both research (I often spoke to key players to gain insight) and customer empathy (really get inside a particular audience’s head).

You may write a dozen headlines that you toss out before you hit that winning concept. It’s also important to track clickthrough data (and, if you can, end actions) to see what performs well and analyze why. This feeds a cycle that can really improve your headline writing over time, particularly if you’re addressing multiple audience segments – as I was here. Over time, I really learned what each segment responded to and used that to shape my headlines.

Car salesmen have a reputation for being slightly below pond scum on the evolutionary scale. I know this to be true, having encountered many sub-evolutionary beings while car shopping in Texas. The bar has been set so low that just one good experience can win customers for life – or until someone else screws it up.

Dave and I were loyal Saturn customers for more than a decade. The marketing focused on “A different Car Company” and car buying experience. Sales people were salaried, prices were fixed and the cars were decent compact family cars.

We first encountered Saturn in New Jersey, one week prior to a cross-country move. We had recently sold a second car and were preparing to move in a Pontiac Sunbird. Perhaps it should have been a Firebird, as catching fire is exactly what it did less than a week before the movers arrived.

Jobless, carless and soon to be homeless we took a leap of faith and went to Saturn. After practically blubbering in the salesman’s office, he sold us a battered but functional Saturn at cost and wished us well on our trip.

That simple act of mercy earned our loyalty and repeat business. You may remember the ad campaign that ended, “They’re Saturn People.” We were. We bought two more Saturns within five years, and used the dealership exclusively for maintenance. We fully expected to buy two more Saturns to replace them. But by the time we were ready for Saturn #4, the company we knew and loved was gone.

Technically, Saturn still existed – but General Motors had changed everything that made Saturn well, Saturn. The cars had expanded into gas-guzzling road hogs, and the prices rose to match. Finding out that GM killed the original electric car, a Saturn, was the last straw. Our faith was gone, and so was our loyalty. We decided to buy a Prius.

Having been Toyota shopping with others as a child, I frankly dreaded going to the dealer. I was pleasantly surprised to see that the company also had the “no dicker sticker” price tag, a major selling point for Saturn in the past. Plus we were generally treated well by the dealership, Toyota of Burien. The salesman did not have the ease or panache of a Saturn person, but we were content enough to buy a service plan and commit to a 30+ minute drive south for maintenance visits.

Which brings me back to Saturn. My current car is the last of our Saturns, and I’ve been reluctant to turn it around for many reasons. And until recently, I was happy to be one of the last Saturn People standing – even if my loyalties were leaning towards Dave’s Prius. I’ve known for a while that my next car would be a Prius. It wasn’t a matter of if, but when. A series of very expensive mechanical failures made the “when” decision for me.

On Friday, I finally decided it was time. We made financing arrangements and plans to shop on Sunday. I checked around all the Toyota dealer sites, and determined that Toyota of Burien, where we bought Dave’s car, was the only one with Priuses (Prii?) in stock. Having a history with the dealership made it the easiest choice to make all weekend. Dave called down to ask a few questions related to the down payment, and mentioned we’d be there on Sunday to look at Priuses.

On Sunday, we sacrificed our beloved sleep-in day to get to Toyota of Burien early. Our goal was to be wrapped up in time to drive my new Prius to lunch. Upon arrival, we found the place empty – but a receptionist rounded up a sales person quickly. We informed him we were in the market for a Prius, and he escorted us to the lot.

The Prius was locked, and the salesman went inside to get the keys. While he was gone, we determined that I really didn’t need to test drive a generic model, I just wanted to see the stock. The salesman returned and we asked to see the available stock. He blanched and told us that they don’t have any available, but we can test drive the model.

I brought up the Web site, and asked where all the cars were. He began talking about various government incentives (legitimate) but failed to answer the question: Why did you say you have them in stock if you don’t? I finally asked him to leave us alone so we could chat. The salesman literally ran into the building.

Before we could escape, the salesman and his manager came out. I reiterated that we had traveled a long way, and wished they had told us they didn’t have cars on the lot. His answer: Dave talked to Finance, they don’t know anything. Okay, fine. Perhaps you should tell the webmaster? He also brought up the tax incentives, which were driving business. Understandable, but again, I feel lied to here. Finally, he mentioned that there was a waiting list of 160 people.

We left.

As Dave drove, I called another dealership, Bob Bridge Toyota just down the road in Renton and reached a salesman named Dale. I asked him if they had any Priuses in stock. He good-naturedly responded, “Nope,” and asked if I was trying to beat the tax incentive deadline of July 31. Because if I was, he noted, I should try another dealership. If not, he thought he could have something in 2-3 weeks, depending on my needs.

I told him we’d be there in 10 minutes.

We spent about an hour with Dale going through everything from financing to timing issues. He answered every single question correctly, and even suggested an interior color that hides dirt while smiling at our grubby 6-year-old son. The dealership also gave our trade-in Saturn a once over in record time, saving us time later. We put a deposit down and headed across the street in time for lunch.

Based on the service we received today, we’ll be taking my new Prius back to Bob Bridge for service – and yes, it’s still about a half hour or so away from home – and we might be taking Dave’s there, too. Why? Because they were fast, efficient and honest. They didn’t waste my time and they didn’t play games. The salesman was confident and ready to lose the sale if it would benefit the customer. (At least, he allowed me to believe that.) And the only time he got his manager was when I asked him to – so I could compliment his work.

Today officially ends our time as Saturn People and reinforced our customer loyalty to Toyota – specifically, Bob Bridge. Because in the end, it only takes one bad customer experience to screw it up for everyone, be it a personal interaction or changing the brand so radically your customers no longer recognize it.

It’s too bad GM never learned that lesson.

This week represents the motherload of all Twitter cycles, as the Twitterati descend upon San Diego Comicon (SDCC). There is a long and glorious cross-over between technophiles and comics/sci-fi/fantasy fans–and SDCC is their harmonic convergence. (It’s so much more than a “nerd prom.”)

The obligatory marketing tool for this year’s SDCC is Twitter itself. Every major media outlet has set up either a general Twitter account for “reporting” or individual accounts for reporters… in many cases, both. Through cross-promotion through traditional media (house ads in magazines), online (”follow us on Twitter” announcements on Websites and stories) and Twitter itself, everyone is attempting to get your attention.

I follow several of them normally, and this week, I’m getting spammed with SDCC coverage. I appreciate the effort, but a vague tweet and link will not get my attention. (The Ausiello Files actually tweeted “I just had a really interesting interview with…” and a link. You had to click to find out who it was.) While this may seem cute and intriguing, I found it cloying. I’m already reading hundreds of tweets. Give me a reason why I should click yours.

What I find far more interesting is the artists themselves. Actors, comic artists, writers, and others all can be found on Twitter, discussing their experiences and providing tips on where to find them. (Heroes alum Brea Grant mentioned she was going to return to a booth unannounced for additional signings after numerous Twitter followers failed to see her during a scheduled signing.) Many artists also share goofy personal photos from the floor that won’t show up in People.

HBO, Showtime, SyFy, and other SDCC-friendly networks are trying out a similiar approach this year, setting up show-specific Twitter accounts for shows represented at the con, including True Blood and Dexter. The accounts focus purely on giving fans insider info about the shows. Show-related panels are announced early enough that fans have a shot at getting to the right hall and scoring a seat. Personal appearances, including some “surprise” appearances at partner booths, are also slip-streamed. It’s a small thing, but it means a lot to fans. And for those who couldn’t get there, videos and other tidbits are posted and linked in a timely fashion.

This fan focus shows an awareness of what comicon truly is and isn’t. Yes, it’s a major promotion opportunity for the production companies, comic artists, actors, and so on. But it is also the world’s largest celebration of all things geek, which certainly includes Twitter.

Well, this year, anyway.

So when I find a code for a free game on my cherry tomatoes container, I’m inclined to give it a try. Though I was a bit dismayed at what I found:

Cherubs Tomatoes Match-3 game (click to play)

This “game” shows a lack of knowledge of the marketer’s target audience, which – as I know from my time working in casual games – is older women. Sure, it’s a Match-3 puzzler but it’s a) extremely dated and b) goes against the expectation of what a free game code should deliver.

Your average housewife has moved beyond the simple online Match-3. Games like Bejeweled Blitz and CSI – The Game are much more diverting than mindlessly matching a few branded icons together. And game codes are more typically redeemed for full-featured downloadable games, not a simple Web game that you don’t really even need a code for (the code directs you, but once you’re there you could share the link to the actual game).

The game does match with the collection of games offered in the Kid Friendly “Fun Zone” but all but the smallest children would be quickly bored by this frail offering. My own 6-year-old is already hooked on Nintendo DS and plays more complex games like Avatar and Kirby. His matching game of choice is the much deeper Pokemon Trozei. In fact, two of the three games currently in the Fun Zone (High Flying Cherubs and Make a Match) are better than this basic Match-3 clone. (The third is a print-a-PDF coloring page.)

There are a few ways this campaign could have been better conceived. The code could have unlocked a more full-featured downloadable game. Nature Sweet might have partnered with a casual game company to create a branded version of a successful franchise, such as a hidden object game (find the hidden Cherubs!) or platformer (Cherub’s jumping adventure in the land of the evil weeds!). Or they could have created a richer version of the Match-3 game with power-ups, leaderboards, and weekly prizes for top scorers.

Instead, the majority of casual game-savvy customers who take the time to enter their codes and play this game will be left with bad tastes in their mouths. Which was probably NOT the campaign’s goal.

So we have relaunched this site as a blog where we can tell you some of what we’re up to and share the unique insights we’ve uncovered to help you navigate the stormy waters of Web 2.0 and beyond.